Talk to your kids.
Talk to your kids. I keep hearing that from parents and experts alike. Talk to your kids early, and talk to them about mental health. What exactly does this mean?
To be clear, I am NOT a mental health expert. I’m just a mom. But I think I’ve learned a few things through the many conversations I’ve had on The Just A Mom podcast. Here’s what I think “talk to your kids” means:
Ask a lot of questions, not just yes and no ones.
Have dinner together as often as you can.
NO PHONES AT THE DINNER TABLE
If you need help coming up with topics of conversation, I recommend Table Topics. These are cards with thought provoking questions to get everyone in your family talking.
Model talking about mental health and taking care of your mental health so your kids can see you and learn from example.
Make it ok to openly express feelings.
LISTEN. Yes, you read that correctly. Listen. Be ready to listen when your kid wants to talk. Don’t interrupt, try to fix or tell them that they’re wrong. Just listen.
Validate their feelings. For example, if your child tells you that a friend hurt his feelings, let them know that it does not feel good when a friend hurts us and it’s ok to talk about it. Don’t just go into fix-it mode (like I often did).
Offer to look for a therapist for your child. Be willing to go to a therapist yourself as well. If you can’t afford one, see this blog post (blog post on what to do if you can’t afford a therapist)
Tell your children in word and deed how much you love them every day.
